If It Doesn't Kill You It Makes You Stronger??

Is there virtue in suffering? When you google the verb suffering you end up with lots of hits on the religious virtues of suffering (as in Jesus' suffering on the cross), but I think that their is also secular virtue in suffering.

We used to say at the college "if it doesn't kill you it makes you stronger" - and we believed it. I think of the inner strength and character that was cultivated by survivoring Vietnam POWs. Similarly I think of cancer survivors who developed inner strength and belief.

I do not know whether the strength of faith, belief in self or other belief develops character, but clearly through the suffering some can find great strength and purpose.

Suffering aids us in seeing the real worth of things. When one passes through the experience of intense suffering, and perhaps comes to the threshold of death, the entire world can take on new meaning. The singing of the birds is more vivid than it ever has been. A fresh spring day makes the soul ecstatic. Family and friends take on a new preciousness.

Christopher Reeve, who starred as “Superman” in the movies, was involved in a life-threatening accident, and discovered that in real life he was not as invincible as the character he portrayed. Prior to his death, Mr. Reeve commented that since being paralyzed, he has discovered a new zest for life. Indeed, suffering can provide a sharper vision of life’s priorities. As the poet John Dryden expressed it: “We, by our suff’rings, learn to prize our bliss” (Astraea Redux). He that hath an ear, let him hear what suffering whispers to the soul.

I walked a mile with Pleasure

She chatted all the way, But left me none the wiser

For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow

And ne’er a word said she;

But oh, the things I learned from her

When Sorrow walked with me!

Teach Your Team to Fish - A Damn Good Book

I have suffered a lot of business book "don’t reads", but recently came across an exceptional book that I would like to share. Laurie Beth Jones’ book Teach Your Team to Fish: Using Ancient Wisdom for Inspired Teamwork (Three Rivers Press, New York, 2002) is a must read.

Laurie Jones’ starts with the leadership foundation mantra of "none of us is as smart as all of us" and shares with the reader specifics ways and tools to build a high-functioning inclusive team. The book’s title drawn from the proverb of "Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime" is the books’ overarching theme.

Laurie Jones’ uses Jesus as a role model of exceptional leadership and uses his action to demonstrate specific lessons. For some Jesus’ life may not connect and the examples be seen as "over the top", but I assure that even the most secular atheist reader will be able to discern the applicable lessons.

The book’s engaging style of having almost fifty 2-3 page micro-chapters on different aspects of team building allows for readers to selective dip into areas of specific interest (i.e. turning criticism into construction, going small to go big, valuing diversity, being kind but not always nice, identifying coachable moments and choosing your battles). I have found that the micro-chapters quickly become two-page handouts for team meetings.

The end of each micro-chapters has a series of question that the reader can practically apply to their workplace. These questions "make it" and "keep it real". I have found many other business books great in theory, but no so great in practice. Laurie Jones’ Teach Your Team to Fish: Using Ancient Wisdom for Inspired Teamwork is great in both theory and practice and I highly recommend it to all those involved in team building.

The Apprentice - Chronicle Herald, Sat March 5, 2004

The lesson to be learned from "Net Worth’s" loss this week on The Apprentice is do not take things personally. Angie, who was this week’s losing Project Manager (PM), lobbied her team of "Street Smarts" to be the PM because she felt slighted at the last board room when she was called "the weak link."

She did not seek feedback to clarify why she was perceived to be "the weak link", but she personalized the comment and became emotionally defensive and over-sensitive. The emotionally charged interaction on the suite balcony at the beginning of the episode created a shaky foundation of emotional egg shells for the entire task.

Once Angie became PM through emotionally blackmailing her teammates, she failed to earn her teams respect as she was overly driven and controlled by personal feelings in her communications.

Throughout the mini-golf task a grudge match was ongoing between Angie and John. John fell equally to emotional mud slinging when he refused to follow Angie’s direction because of his personal dislike of her, and was exemplified in his derisive sling in the Board Room when he called her a "22 year-old girl".

Leaders need to harness their emotions and use emotion as a positive tool to achieve a common goal. If emotions are not harnessed in this way, they become destructive and lead to petty feuds and mudslinging.

Networking or Brown Nosing?

I think that there is a fine line when it comes to networking. I keep on reading that it is important to network - "If you want to fly with eagles, you have to hang out with eagles and learn how they do it." But I am always worried about the soft under belly of "blind ambition with no content" or making it by because of who you know, not what you know.

I truly believe in the theory of six degrees of separation - or as in Canada it should be known as one degree of separation. Way too many times the chain of connection is way too close.

Networking in my experience is making connections with people. You do not have to have a goal other than making connections and being willing to give. Network yes, but be sincere and make sure you put in the hard work to go where you want to go.